


Double Agent

by Blizzard_Fire



Series: Bruce Week 2020 [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Now You See Me (Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Bruce Banner has a twin brother, Bruce Banner-centric, Bruce is also confused, Crack Treated Seriously, Domestic Avengers, Drunk Clint Barton, Dylan Rhodes is done with this shit, Dylan is having a really bad day, Gen, Humor, Mistaken Identity, Natasha/Dylan the pairing no one asked for, Twins, everyone is confused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:14:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23512948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blizzard_Fire/pseuds/Blizzard_Fire
Summary: AKA 5 Times the Avengers Mistook Dylan Rhodes For Bruce BannerSteve slowed to a halt. 'Hey, what are you doing here?'"Bruce" looked up and gave him a cold stare that was entirely un-Brucelike. 'I'm trying to enjoy my coffee. That okay with you?'Steve was taken aback. 'Right. Uh, okay.''Hey, I know you.' His eyes narrowed as he sipped his coffee. 'You're Captain America. Cool. Go have fun doing... whatever it is you actually do all day.'And Steve was so bewildered that he just gave Bruce a curt nod and jogged off.The Avengers keep bumping into "Bruce" outside the tower, but why does he pretend not to know them? Anyone would think Bruce had a secret twin or something...
Relationships: Bruce Banner & Dylan Rhodes
Series: Bruce Week 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1671742
Comments: 8
Kudos: 173
Collections: Bruceweek





	Double Agent

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt: "Mystery, Mistakes" for Bruce Week 2020.
> 
> I was struggling with this prompt until I thought of "mistaken identity" and then this was born. This was originally going to be something more serious with chase scenes and stuff but this idea was WAY more fun.
> 
> This is set before Now You See Me 1 so there's no spoilers for the movie. (If you're a Ruffalo fan I highly recommend it!)

It was Steve who first discovered "Bruce's" double life.

It was a warm summer's day, and Steve was out for an early morning jog around Central Park when he passed a familiar figure sitting on a bench. Bruce was scrolling through his phone, takeaway coffee cup in hand. Strangely, he was dressed in a smart suit and tie.

Steve slowed to a halt. 'Enjoying the weather?' he nodded at Bruce's black jacket, which seemed a little extravagant in this heat.

Bruce barely spared him a glance. 'Yeah. Great.'

He smiled uncertainly. 'What are you doing here?'

Bruce looked up and gave him a cold stare that was entirely un-Brucelike. 'I'm trying to enjoy my coffee. That okay with you?'

Steve was taken aback. 'Right. Uh, okay.'

'Hey, I know you.' His eyes narrowed as he sipped his coffee. 'You're Captain America. Cool. Go have fun doing...' He glanced pointedly at Steve's sweat-stained shirt. '...whatever it is you actually do all day.'

And Steve was so bewildered that he just gave Bruce a curt nod and jogged off. Yes, Bruce was standoffish sometimes but he was never outright _rude._ It didn't make any sense.

When he got back to the tower, he made breakfast for the other Avengers (there was no sign of Bruce). Everyone was on their third helping of pancakes when Tony crowed, 'And what time do you call this? It's nearly midday.'

Steve turned, spatula in hand. Bruce shuffled in, wearing an oversized sweater and running a hand through his sleep-ruffled hair. 'I uh, had a bad night.' He met Steve's gaze and offered an apologetic smile. 'Has Thor eaten all the pancakes yet?'

Thor chuckled. 'Alas, I tried.'

Steve busied himself mixing up another batch of batter. 'So uh, what was all that about this morning?' he asked quietly as Bruce wandered over.

'What was what about?' He stifled a yawn behind his hand.

'When I spoke to you earlier. Were you on a date or something?'

He laughed. 'What are you talking about? No, no date. Just trying to catch up on my sleep, without much success.' There were dark circles under his eyes, and he seemed to have lost the attitude from that morning.

Natasha got up and poured herself a steaming mug from the coffee maker. 'Want one?' she asked.

He padded over to the dining table and sank into a chair. 'No, thanks. I hate coffee.'

As the other Avengers settled back into easy conversation, Steve cooked up some more pancakes and wondered if he'd imagined the whole thing.

Natasha always went hard at the gym.

Usually she preferred the one at Stark Tower, complete with obstacle course, robot targets and a giant waterslide, but it was being refurbished to make room for a ball pit area (Steve had made the sarcastic suggestion and Tony had taken it as a challenge).

Plus, it was hard not to attract attention when you could literally run rings around the general public. She took a long, hard sprint on the treadmill, tackled the climbing wall with ease and finally swam some laps in the pool to cool off.

She emerged from the showers and strolled through the lobby, pleasantly sore and ready for an evening of watching movies with Clint.

That was when she saw Bruce: damp-haired, wearing a thin shirt and jeans, and chugging a bottle of water like he was about to die of thirst. Odd to see him so unguarded in such a public space. She watched with some concern as he finished the bottle, crushed it and tossed it into the trashcan outside.

She fell into step beside him, offering her half-finished bottle. 'Don't push yourself in this heat. You okay?'

He looked up and his eyebrows rose in surprise. 'Yeah. Uh, thanks.' He took it from her and took a long swig. 'Got a little enthusiastic in there, I guess.'

She smiled sympathetically. 'Got to get the anger out somehow, huh?'

They walked half a block, then Bruce stopped when he realised she was following him. She didn't miss his brief downward glance at her, or the soft smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth as he met her gaze. 'I'm sorry, have we met?'

Natasha let herself slip into another persona. 'You do look familiar,' she said playfully. 'One of those faces.'

'Yeah?' His brown eyes searched hers. 'We haven't - worked together or anything?'

Was he... flirting with her? 'Oh, once or twice. I hear you're the best in your field.'

He chuckled, not looking away. 'Well, I'm not exactly hard to find. I'm sure I'd have remembered you, though.'

Natasha searched his face. Something about him seemed... off. 'I thought you were working with Tony today? From what he said it sounded pretty important.' In fact, the two of them had talked of nothing else for the past week; some new gizmo that would automate a lot of menial tasks. Beyond that, it was a secret between them.

He shrugged. 'It's my day off today.' He pressed the cold water bottle against his cheek. 'Hence the workout. Why, are you asking if I'm free?'

He _was_ flirting. Natasha found herself gawping. 'What - what are you doing?'

He looked puzzled, then shook his head apologetically and turned away. 'Nevermind. Thanks for... for this.' He held up the nearly-finished bottle of water. 'Maybe I'll see you around.' He started walking, but Natasha stood still.

'You know the tower's that way, right? Are you sure you're okay?'

But he merely offered her a small smile before crossing the street and heading off in the opposite direction.

Natasha stared after him. Bruce, flirting? Until now, he hadn't shown the slightest interest in any kind of relationship, and certainly not with her. Maybe the heat was getting to him.

She reached for her water, then remembered it wasn't there. With a defeated shrug, she headed for home.

'It's beautiful.' Tony pulled off his goggles and gazed down lovingly at the workbench.

'The product of nearly eighty hours of work between us.' Bruce scratched his chin. 'Was it worth it?'

'This is our baby, Bruce. Our _baby._ Our intellects made sweet, sweet love and created the ultimate feat of engineering and artificial intelligence.'

Bruce picked it up. To the untrained eye, it looked like a Roomba. In fact, it _was_ a Roomba - just a heavily-upgraded one. He pressed a button and a mechanical arm sprung out, armed with a knife. 'It seems like a lot of effort for a glorified potato peeler, Tony.'

'But think of the hours that will be saved! Think how much mash this thing's gonna make!' He ran a loving hand over the sleek metal. 'Already got the name. Smart Peel Ultra Deluxe. SPUD for short.'

'Nice.' Bruce smiled. 'You wanna test it out?'

They carried it into the kitchen where Natasha was slouched at the table, still in workout clothes and drinking a large green smoothie. 'Hey boys,' she said as the entered. 'Feeling better, Bruce?'

Bruce smiled back hesitantly. 'I will if this goes smoothly.'

With great ceremony, Tony set SPUD down on the counter. 'Alright little fella, let's see what you're made of. Now, this thing _does_ have AI, but it's a learning AI.'

Bruce gave him a sharp look. 'Has it learned the difference between a potato and a human hand yet? Because I feel like that's important.'

'You worry too much. SPUD, run sequence!'

With an electronic chirp, SPUD trundled merrily along the counter until it came to the pile of potatoes. Mechanical arms shot out with a _clang._

Natasha leapt up. 'You _armed_ it?'

'It's fine.' Tony slung an arm over Bruce's shoulders. 'This thing is going to revolutionise mealtimes. We're not stopping at peeling veggies, oh no. Pretty soon it'll be cooking up steaks and scrambled eggs and homemade soups...'

SPUD spun the potato and peeled it in five seconds flat. Then promptly flung it across the room. Natasha's smoothie exploded, showering them all in green gunk.

Bruce removed his glasses and wiped his face on his sleeve. 'How's it feel to be a father, Tony?'

'Hey, the peeling went fine! He just needs a chance to learn.' Tony licked his lips and pulled a face. 'Nat, did you put _carrots_ in this?'

Bruce sighed. 'I'm going to go and change. Why don't you try out some of the voice commands?'

'Voice commands?' said Natasha when Bruce had gone.

'We gave SPUD here some fun extra gadgets. Nothing that would make JARVIS blush, just some flashy stuff. He can order groceries, make phonecalls, track schedules, set reminders...'

She folded her arms. 'So you basically gave Siri a kitchen knife?'

'Well, aren't you full of enthusiasm this morning.' Tony grabbed a paper towel to clean the smoothie off the walls. 'I wanna call someone and tell them they're talking to a potato peeler. Hey, SPUD? Call Rhodey.'

SPUD blurped and said in a tinny voice, _'Name not found in address book.'_

'What? Call James Rhodes.'

_'Name not found in address book.'_

Tony sighed. 'You have the whole government address book in there! I could call the president if - '

_'Calling...'_

Oh god, cancel! Cancel! Okay, try Rhodes. Got anyone under Rhodes?'

_'Calling...'_

The phone picked up on the second ring. 'Rhodes,' said a voice, but it wasn't Rhodey. 'Who is this?'

Tony blinked. 'Oh, hey Bruce. You are now the first person on earth to receive a SPUD call.'

There was a lengthy pause. 'Um, okay.'

Natasha grabbed a juice from the fridge. 'Congratulations on your firstborn.'

'Oh, hey. Is that you?' Bruce's voice picked up. 'How did you get this number?'

Tony snorted. 'What do you take me for? I programmed it in. All the latest hardware. Even better, this call is completely encrypted. No one can listen in. So tell me.' He leaned in closer to the device. 'What are you wearing right now?'

There was a rustle, then the sound of a door closing. 'What? What did you say?'

'I promise I won't blush.' Tony flashed a smirk at her. 'Nothing leaves this room, it's just between you, me, Romanov and SPUD here.'

'Did Cowan put you up to this? Or Fuller?'

'We all know you have Hulk underwear. There's no shame in it.'

Bruce laughed humourlessly. 'Don't call this number again.' There was a click and the line went dead.

Natasha and Tony stared at each other. 'He _does_ have Hulk underwear!' said Tony in wonder.

Natasha shook her head. 'He's been acting a little weird today. You've been working on that thing day and night. Maybe he's been overdoing it?'

They finished cleaning the wall, then Tony tried to reprogram SPUD.

'Did you try the settings out?' Bruce finally returned wearing a fresh shirt. He stopped in the doorway when he saw their stares. 'What? Is there something on my face?' He rubbed his cheek self-consciously. 'SPUD seems good, I think it just needs some fine-tuning. Letting it learn to throw potatoes is just setting a bad precedent.'

SPUD bleeped. _'Calling...'_

'No!' cried everyone at once.

Thor had developed a fondness for Midgardian bars.

They were quiet and tame compared to the mead halls back home, but he'd learned to love them for their eccentric architecture and interesting people. Sometimes it was good to get away by himself and make some new friends. He was already on his fifth beer and had attracted small crowd of admirers. Some of them seemed a little _too_ interested.

'Alas, I am already besotted with my Lady Jane,' he said modestly, and a few of them retreated in disappointment.

That was when he caught sight of a face across the room. Bruce was half-slumped over the bar, watching the small TV on the wall and nursing a dwindling glass of drink.

'One moment, my friends.' Thor extracted himself from his audience and headed over. Bruce glanced up warily as he approached, eyes a little unfocused. 'What brings you here, my friend?'

'You've got the wrong guy, pal,' Bruce grunted, returning his attention to his drink. His tie was loose around his neck and his jacket was thrown over the back of his chair.

Thor sat on the stool beside him. 'Are you well? I thought you did not drink.'

'I said you've got the wrong guy. I don't know who you are.' Bruce knocked back the last of his drink and set it down. 'What do you want?'

Thor laughed. 'Ah, you jest with me. Midgardian humour continues to elude me. Come, have a drink with us!' By now, half the bar was looking in their direction. Despite his fugginess, Bruce looked distinctly uncomfortable at the attention. 'Fear not, should the beast arise we shall ply him with drink!' And he slung a matey arm around Bruce's shoulders.

Bruce moved like lightning. He ducked under Thor's arm, spun around and in the next second Thor's face was pressed against the sticky bar counter with his arm twisted behind his back. 'Bruce - '

The hold on him released, and Thor straightened up feeling rather foolish. Everyone was watching them now.

Thor turned back to where Bruce had sat, but the jacket on the chair was gone and so was he. The man was as immaterial as one of Loki's illusions.

Thor plastered on a smile and loudly ordered another drink.

Clint was a highly-trained assassin, a master archer and a responsible SHIELD agent. On weekdays.

But tonight was Friday night, so his only mission was to get absolutely shit-faced. He'd lost Natasha, Bucky and Sam some hours ago and his phone not long after that, so now he was wandering the streets at asscrack o'clock looking for a suitable wall to piss against.

That was when he saw the high-security building with the ten-foot-high fence. It seemed as good a place as any.

He was so drunk he didn't even register the approaching footsteps. What he also failed to notice was the large sign which read _DANGER: ELECTRIC FENCE._ Whistling, he unzipped himself and prepared to let rip.

'FBI! Stop right there!' someone shouted, and then there were hands roughly grabbing his shoulders.

The first jet of urine arced elegantly and spattered against the fence. There was the faintest crackle, then Clint was thrown backwards as if he'd just been punched in the groin. He had a soft landing: there was a satisfying _oof_ as his assailant cushioned his fall.

The man beside him groaned. 'What the hell were you doing? Put your hands where I can see them.'

Clint's arms were yanked behind his back and he felt the cold bite of handcuffs on his wrists.

A second set of footsteps hurried over. 'Rhodes, you good?' A woman's voice.

'Yeah, I'm good.' The man tried to haul him up but Clint was too drunk to stand. 'What's your name? This is a restricted area.'

Clint just curled up like a shrimp. 'Argh, m'dick! I can't feel m'dick!'

The woman sighed. 'What do we do with him?'

'We take him back with us. It's probably all an act.'

And so Clint was bundled into the back of a police car and driven to the station. He would later have little memory of arriving and being examined by a medical officer, who assured him that his penis would make a full recovery.

The next thing he knew, he was handcuffed to a table in a bright white room. He grinned and waved at the one-way mirror, knowing that someone would be observing him from behind it.

A short while later, the door opened and in walked - 

Clint squinted at him. Curly brown hair, stubbled jaw, dark eyes - 'Bruce? Oh man, s'good to see ya. Y'come to bail me out?'

The man sat down in the vacant chair opposite him. 'No one's bailing you out until I get some answers from you.'

'Whatever y'say, man. God, I am _wasted_ right now.'

Bruce didn't smile. 'What were you doing outside of a high-security government facility?'

Clint frowned and looked more closely. Bruce was wearing a suit and tie, and he had the air of someone who had seen a lot of shit and wasn't about to take any. A name badge was clipped to his belt but thanks to Clint's beer-goggles even his eagle eyes couldn't read it. 'I was... taking a leak.'

He nodded without breaking eye-contact, eyebrows raising. 'On the electric fence?'

'Yeah.' Clint rubbed his face, the cold handcuff grating against his cheek. He would really like to go to sleep now. 'Is that illegal? Pissing?'

Bruce stood up and leaned over the table. 'You can play dumb with me all you want, _Barton_ , but I know you were trying to break in there. Yes, we know who you are. Maybe you took a dose of alcohol high enough to pick up on a breathalyzer once you knew you'd gotten caught. You might be with SHIELD but you're not above the law. Whose orders were you on? I want a name.'

Clint was so confused. Yes he'd had a lot to drink but... Bruce in a suit? Interrogating him? He felt like this should have made sense somehow but Bruce wasn't giving him any help.

'I said whose orders were you on?'

'Jodie's.' Clint licked his lips. 'She runs a really good bar. Gave her a _lot_ of orders.' He burped. That booze really wasn't settling well. Maybe he shouldn't move for a little while.

He scowled. 'If you want, I can arrest you right now for wasting police time.'

Something about his serious expression got Clint giggling. 'Dude... you look so _funny_ in a suit, I don't know why! It's hilarious...'

Bruce stood over him. 'Answer the question smartass,' he growled. 'You really don't want to piss me off.'

Was he seriously going to Hulk out in here? 'I didn't take orders from anyone! It's my day off! Why you bein' such a dick? Tony put you up to this? 'M I on camera?' He looked around. These lights were really bright. His stomach roiled.

'If you weren't under SHIELD's orders then you still had an agenda.'

'I don't feel good,' Clint groaned.

Bruce lunged forward and grabbed his shoulders. _'Who are you working for_ _?'_

Clint threw up on him.

'For god's sake!' Bruce leapt back, vomit dripping down his pressed shirt and tie. The stench of cheap vodka was horrific in the small room. 'You asshole - '

The door opened and the female agent from earlier stepped in. 'Do you need any help?'

'This guy is useless.' WIth a shake of his head, Bruce stormed out of the room. 'Lock him up for the night, I'll talk to him when he's sober.'

The next morning, Clint awoke to the sound of his cell door opening. He groaned, feeling a killer hangover coming on.

The stern-faced guard stepped away, revealing Natasha standing behind him. 'Really, Barton?' she said as he got up and traipsed over. 'You peed on an electric fence?'

'Yeah. I think. I don't really remember.' Most of last night was a blur. They'd taken him in for questioning... 'Oh god, does Fury know?'

'Oh yeah, Fury knows everything. He bailed you out, he's waiting in the car outside. And he's looking forward to a _long_ chat with you on the way home.'

'Ugh. Great.' He rubbed his crotch experimentally and winced. 'At least it's not numb anymore. Ow...'

As Natasha led them out of the station, Clint chewed over what he remembered from last night. 'Hey Nat, this is gonna sound nuts, but there was an FBI guy here - I swear it was Bruce.'

She rolled her eyes. 'How much did you have to drink?'

'Too much. And yeah I was wasted, but... I was so sure at the time.' He couldn't quite picture him now, but his voice had sounded so familiar.

'Well, Bruce was watching old war movies with Steve all yesterday evening so I think he's got a solid alibi. Come on.' She linked an arm through his. 'Let's get you home. There's a stack of paperwork the weight of a small child sitting on your desk.'

'Joy.' Clint shuffled out, casting a final suspicious glance behind him. 'Maybe Bruce leads a secret double life. One where he's a condescending asshole.'

Natasha laughed, but she seemed thoughtful as they walked over to Fury's car. 'I wonder...'

Aliens attacked New York, _again_ , and after the Avengers sent them packing it was time to go home.

Steve hefted his shield onto his back and pressed a finger to his earpiece. 'Tony? We good?'

 _'A-OK, Capsicle.'_ Tony sounded tired. The propulsors of his suit rumbled in the background. _'You guys got Bruce yet?'_

He sighed, gazing sadly at the landscape of smoke and debris. 'No sign. I'm afraid I got separated from everyone. Hulk was headed towards the park, he's probably changed back by now.'

_'I'll find him. New addition to the scanner: I've got a Banner detector. You head back, I'll meet you there.'_

Steve slowly made his way back to the tower, still caked in dust and dirt. He bumped into Clint and Natasha along the way and the three of them limped across the grounds to Stark Tower.

Thor met them at the door with a smile and a swollen lip. 'My friends! You fought magnificently. Come and sit, let us tell of our brave deeds!'

Clint groaned, pressing a grubby fist against his black eye. 'Only deeds I'm doing are booze-related ones.'

They were about to head inside when they heard the distant whoosh of the Iron Man suit. Steve turned in time to see Tony land on the grass, depositing his weak-kneed passenger. 'Your Banner detector was a success?'

'Flawless,' said Tony proudly, visor flipping open. 'It hones in on Bruce's DNA, I swoop down and carry him home. Couldn't be simpler. He put up a bit of a fight, though.'

Bruce lay in an undignified heap on the grass, breathing hard. 'What - the _hell_ \- was that?'

Clint laughed. 'Woah, nice suit Doc. Where the hell did you find that? Did Hulk land in a clothes store or something?'

Steve frowned. Bruce was indeed wearing a suit - a very rumpled one - and his expression was positively murderous. One sleeve was torn off and he was missing a shoe.

'How do you feel, friend?' asked Thor.

He stared back, forehead creased in exasperation. 'What? How do you _think_ I feel? This maniac - ' He flung out an arm and pointed at Tony, ' - just flew me across New York!'

Tony leaned down and patted his back. 'Oh come on Brucie, it wasn't that bad. We didn't even hit any buildings this time! And I only almost dropped you once.'

Bruce shut his eyes tightly, wobbling onto all fours. 'You - you - '

'Bruce,' said Natasha slowly, 'why _are_ you dressed like that - ?'

'Because _I'm not Bruce Banner!'_ he spat.

Everyone stared at him.

He glared back, panting. 'I'm his brother.'

Tony's mouth dropped open. 'You're his _what?'_

There was a small cough behind them. Steve turned to see the real Bruce Banner, looking tired and pale in a pair of old jeans and a t-shirt. 'I didn't hear you guys get back,' he said. 'What are you all doing out here?' Then he saw the man on the ground and froze. 'Oh. Hey, Dylan.'

The other Bruce nodded, lips pressed together, and offered a half-hearted wave.

Tony looked from one to the other. 'This is a joke, right? Please tell me this is a joke.'

Bruce's eyes widened in horror. 'Tony... did you _fly_ him here?'

Tony was the picture of innocence. 'Maybe.'

Steves suddenly realised where he'd seen this man before: that day at the park, when Bruce had seemed so out of character...

'You know what? Let's make a deal. I get us all food and Dylan here doesn't sue us. How does that sound?'

Dylan's eyes fluttered closed and he bowed his head. He seemed beyond speaking.

Tony clapped him on the shoulder. 'C'mon. What are ya hungry for? My treat. Shawarma, pizza, sloppy joe?'

Dylan shuddered and vomited onto the grass.

'I guess that's a no.' Tony shrugged and walked towards the tower. 'Someone peel him off the ground for me? I gotta take a leak.'

Steve sighed and went over to help Bruce haul him up.

A few minutes later, everyone was in the living room, seated on squashy couches.

Clint finally broke the awkward silence. 'So uh, you gonna introduce us, Bruce?'

In retrospect, it was no wonder Steve hadn't suspected. Side-by-side, the similarity was even more shocking. Dylan was the spitting image of Bruce, except for the resting scowl face and stockier build. Whilst Bruce always seemed to try and take up as little space as possible, Dylan spread out in his seat, one arm draped over the arm of the couch. His eyes met Steve's and there was a flash of recognition.

Bruce nodded. 'This is Dylan. He's my twin brother.'

Natasha raised her eyebrows. 'Dylan Banner?'

'Dylan _Rhodes,_ ' he said firmly. 'I haven't been a Banner for nearly thirty years.'

'We were adopted into separate families. We haven't been in touch for a while.' Bruce looked over at Dylan. 'I didn't even know he was in New York.'

Steve leaned forward to address Dylan. 'So it was _you_ I met that day in the park?'

Tony clicked his fingers. 'And I called you by accident on my potato peeler!'

Thor grinned in sudden understanding. 'Twas you I met at the bar the other night.'

Natasha smiled. 'You _were_ flirting with me at the gym.'

'Oh my god!' said Clint. 'And you arrested me for peeing on the electric fence!'

All eyes turned to him.

'I was pretty drunk,' he said lamely.

Bruce frowned at Natasha. 'You flirted with my brother?'

'I don't understand,' said Steve. 'We've all been bumping into him. Why didn't he just set the record straight, explain who he was?'

Dylan glanced at Bruce before answering. 'It's better if people don't know we're related. We move in different circles now; I'm an FBI agent and he's... well, he's what he is. Someone might want to use one as leverage against the other.'

Steve noticed the stilted body language between them. Close, but not touching. 'So you two don't talk... at all? You don't have a phone number or anything?'

Bruce shook his head. 'The last time I saw him I was on the run from the authorities. He should have handed me in, but he helped me get away. After that, we lost touch.'

Dylan straightened his tie, a somewhat pointless effort since his shirt was slashed and covered with grass stains. 'I thought about coming to visit. I even saw you a few times. It just never seemed like the right moment. After everything that happened with Ross...' Bruce visibly winced. '...I don't know, I didn't want to call any more attention to you.'

Everyone sat in silence for a long moment. Clint muttered something about needing a drink and Thor hastily got up to "help".

'Twins,' Tony mused. 'So Brucie's the brains and you're the brawn?'

Dylan humphed. 'I'm one of the FBI's top agents but sure, I'm just the brawn.' He sighed. 'You're right, I should have just come clean with you all.' He rubbed a hand over his face wearily. 'The FBI doesn't exactly have the best relationship with the Avengers and with SHIELD.'

Bruce's face softened as he looked at his brother. 'I'm glad you're here.'

Dylan stood up. 'Can I talk to you for a moment? Alone?'

The brothers left the room and the Avengers were left staring at each other in amazement. 'I don't believe it,' said Steve. 'Two Bruces.'

Tony smirked. 'The mind boggles, doesn't it Romanov?'

Natasha threw a cushion at him.

Bruce led the way up to his apartment. The furnishings were simple and sparse, and a large window provided an amazing view of the New York skyline. He turned back to see Dylan taking it all in, his expression giving nothing away. 

'Nice place.' He wandered around, pausing to study the pile of physics journals on the coffee table. 'They treating you well here?'

Bruce nodded. 'It's the first place I've felt safe since...' Ever? '...since the other guy showed up.'

He straightened up. 'But you're stable now? You can control it?'

Always the realist. Whilst Bruce had been the quiet daydreamer, Dylan was the planner. Bruce found himself smiling. 'For the most part, yes.'

'That sounds... reassuring.' But he was smiling too. Then he sighed. 'I missed you. Every day after you disappeared I was checking the news, doing what research I could, trying to track you down. But then I realised that if I knew... I became just one more person who might put you in danger. I should have been there for you. I'm sorry.'

Bruce found himself wringing his hands and quickly shoved them in his pockets. 'Well, you're here now, aren't you?'

Dylan looked out of the window, shoulders slumped. Thirty years was a long time to be apart. How did you begin to bridge a gap like that? Dylan never spoke of his adopted family. Bruce hoped they'd been good to him.

Hulk-outs always left him feeling tired and cold, so he grabbed his favourite grey sweater before joining him at the window. 'Do you remember that day in first grade, when they asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up?'

Dylan chuckled. 'Yeah.'

'I said I wanted to be an astronaut and you wanted to be James Bond? Well, I don't think we were far off.' After all these years, he still looked so much like him. Sometimes Bruce forgot he still had family. 'You should come visit sometime, meet the others properly. They're a little strange at first but they're good people.'

He hummed non-committally before pacing the room again. 'Stark owes me a drink.'

Bruce smirked. 'Natasha does too, by the sound of it.' The thought of having Dylan around again filled him with warmth. They could catch up on the years they'd missed, they could share a birthday again...

When he glanced up, Dylan was watching him. 'What are you thinking?'

Despite himself, he could feel a grin growing across his face. With Tony, Bruce was always the serious one of the pair. But with Dylan... 'I'm thinking that we have a few years of childhood to make up for,' he confessed. 'Clearly they can't tell the difference between us...'

A slow, thoughtful smile broke across Dylan's face. 'You could be in two places at once.'

They could convince Steve that Bruce had lapped him on his morning run, confuse the hell out of poor Clint, maybe even get Tony puzzled if Dylan could spout sufficient technobabble...

'But first I think I'd better change.' He gestured at his ruined jacket. 'You got something I could borrow?'

Bruce gestured to the bedroom. 'Sure, help yourself.' As Dylan trudged off, he was already imagining walking downstairs together and causing chaos. Bruce had been on the run for most of the last five years. Why shouldn't he have some fun?

Dylan emerged in a blue chequered shirt. 'I have one question for you,' he said, suddenly serious. 'How does Tony Stark know you have Hulk boxer shorts?'

Bruce hid his head in his hands. 'It's a long story...'

**Author's Note:**

> Dylan is so goddam hot in that movie you don't understand
> 
> I actually love the idea of these two as brothers, and their backstories are kept intact if Dylan is adopted elsewhere. They make a great duo. Who knows, I might write more on these two in the future.


End file.
